A lot of the “conventional wisdom” about cheating is pure bullshit. People will tell you “a nice guy like that wouldn’t cheat” or “men just need to sow their wild oats” or “she was looking for something you didn’t provide” – it’s all bullshit.
What we do know about cheating is that it is extremely common and occurs across the whole spectrum of societies, cultures, relationship styles, genders, personalities, etc. Cheaters will give you a million different reasons why, but the only one that matters is that they wanted to.
Don’t waste time trying to figure out the exact reason “why”, he may not know himself and it really doesn’t matter anyways. “Nice“ people cheat, shitty people cheat, nerdy people cheat, extroverted or introverted people cheat.
Thats why society or culture created boundaries. There are certain things you forsake if you are in a commitment. It comes with the teritory otherwise the moment you start feeling safe “that nothing can happen, we are both married, I am not even attracted to them, we are just friends, they are my in-law”, you are a goner.
There are things you get into and they become bigger than you. You exist for something or a cause other than yourself, bigger than yourself. It is a responsibility that comes with adulthood and one should learn to embrace it because thats what maturity is about.
Anyway when your person cheats on you, what you do going forward is decide on whether to stay with them or not. Whatever decision you make basing on what is important to you, it is the right thing to do.
Very Insightful. Thanks
Most guys blame it on their subconscious natural instinct to mate with a female that they find attractive, and it’s not cheating, it’s adultery, most people named it cheating due to the ‘insecurities’ that come when their spouse having sexual relations out side marriage. Ladies, if a man cheats on you, it’s not necessarily true that he doesn’t love you anymore, nope, he loves you but he saw some nice stuff and he just had to smash… He’s still coming home
That’s really messed up. It’s even worse when men keep encouraging themselves to do wrong. This mentality has spread HIV AIDS in Africa. Men don’t want to take responsibility for their actions. This madness has to end. We’re intellectual beings not primitive overly sexual beings that lack the intelligence of what’s right and what’s wrong. When a man gets bored they can engage in their hobbies, sex is not a hobby. An idle mind is the devil’s workshop.