Young adulthood is a transition stage from teenage hood to adulthood. It’s a stage somewhere between 18-29 years. It’s a person’s first taste of maturity through financial independence, freedom to make life choices, exploration of sexuality among others. Not everyone develops at the same rate though; some start dating in their teenage years, others not until their late twenties. Some are financially independent before 18, others take a little longer than that, but roughly speaking, this is the stage when most people develop in such aspects.
It’s not an easy transition however from the comfort being guided and nurtured under a parent’s wing, to coming into the world as an adult expected to be financially and emotionally independent. This stage also comes with a great deal of pressure. From social expectations, to pressure of competing with peers and pressure from the new responsibilities that come with this stage. It’s for this reason that this age is often marred by struggles. Here are six struggles most young adults face.
1. There are things you’re not taught growing up but are expected to know once you’re older: Because of different cultures, there are somethings you don’t learn during childhood. An example is dating. Some African parents tend to be conservative and very protective of their children. That is why they don’t allow them explore their sexuality during their teenage years: a girl is not allowed to be so close to boys and a boy not allowed to be so close to girls. Parents usually do that with good reason; It’s their obligation to protect their children from early sex as well as its consequences. However, when a parent is too protective, this might back fire and result into a young adult unable to explore their sexuality.
For some, they didn’t learn how to manage their own finances. They were raised by a parent who didn’t want them to have any form of discomfort so gave them more than they needed. Coming into adulthood however, they are expected to manage their own finances and hustle. A parent can only teach you so much. There are things you have to learn on your own when you become a young adult. Here’s an article about the imperfection of a parent (link).
2. Pressure: Once you combine social expectations, with peer pressure, the young adult is mounted with certain standards to uphold and expectations to meet within specific timelines; Get a degree by 23, have a job by 24, if you’re a girl, get married and have a kid by 25 or less. If you’re a guy, have a house or car or both by 30. There’s all this pressure to perform and live up to these standards.
The ones that meet these standards earlier make things worse by raising the bar even higher, the ones that make it early; the one’s that become CEOs before 22, or star artists even before 18. It’s tough seeing a 20-year-old start a company while you at 27 are still under your parent’s roof looking for a job or seeing a 22-year-old get married while you’re still single at 30. All this mounts even more pressure. You start hearing people say; “Other people are driving at 25, when will you”
3. All your peers seem to be getting ahead except you: When you look around, you see some of your friends getting married, others are starting businesses, some are going for a second degree, others are getting a job straight out of campus. It often feels like it’s you always lagging behind, like everybody else has figured their lives out except you. When comparing ourselves to others we often compare ourselves unfairly and do not consider other factors. We envy the young person getting there dream job early without considering the fact that he has rich connected parents which gives them a head start. We just go ahead and beat ourselves up for being less competent.
4. Rights and responsibilities: As young adult, you attain the right to make independent decisions; going to school, what career to do all become choices. You gradually get the power to shape your life. However, this power comes with its own responsibility; you have to be responsible for your own career choices, you have to face the consequences of poor life choices like addiction, poor health, poverty. A parent’s control over your life gradually ends, but with it also goes their security; you can no longer run back home to them when life toughens up. You can go ask for advice but you often have to shoulder your own burdens and that’s maturity.
5. You’re expected to succeed: When you try out something new as a child, like; a business, or develop a talent in sports, you’re praised, praised for being the 12-year-old who started a toy making business, or the 16-year-old soccer superstar, you’re special. When you fail, you’re given a pat on the back for even trying. On the contrary, as an adult, you’re often expected to succeed, there’s nothing special about you starting a business or becoming an artist, if you succeed that’s expected. However, when you fail, the world is harsher than when you were a child; it will judge you for failing, society expects more from you since you’re an adult now.
6. You’re expected to make something of yourself: As a child you are only potential; you can be anything but also you’re still nothing; there are boundless possibilities of what you can be but they remain mainly possibilities if you don’t act upon them. You could be an architect, a professional boxer, a musician or a businessman. You’re expected to make something of yourself; to pick a career or talent to develop. This might come at the expense of anything else that you don’t pick; choosing to be a doctor might mean letting go of childhood fantasies of being a professional soccer player or musician. And that’s why adulthood comes with an element of sacrifice.
Those are the few things that young adults have to deal with as they grow up, there are certainly more struggles young adults go through out there, some are unique to one’s circumstances, but generally every young adult is usually dealing with one or more of those problems at any one point in life. However, it’s normal and it’s the price of maturity.
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